The hottest new app available from R-App-Ture has hit the iStore this week: iBelieve is the first cross-faith app on the market, with facilities for all the major religions.
“This is a first for religious apps,” said Max Buck, editor of App World! magazine. “There are a billion apps out there for each religion, this is the first to provide all the facilities in one place.”
For Catholics too busy to get to mass, a picture of bread and wine is displayed on the screen. Through transubstantiation, this becomes the body and blood of Christ. By linking to Siri, it can take confession, and mete out an appropriate number of Hail Marys. For Protestants, it can direct the app user to the nearest store selling Ribena and Ritz crackers.
For Islamic adherents the app can locate Mecca and displays a prayer mat for the praying in the appropriate direction, as well as having a built in Is-Alarm clock to call the faithful to prayer.
“It saves working out in which direction to pray,” said Buck. “Very useful for the busy Islamic devotee.”
The calendar keeps track of a bewildering array of holidays, telling fasting zealots when they can eat. For Christians, it keeps track of which foodstuff is given up for Lent, alerting the user if something they are about to eat contains the foresworn item.
“There are some great facilities for some of the lesser religions,” said Buck. “For instance, for Jehovah’s Witness, it can keep track of which houses were welcoming, and which were less so.”
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For Buddhists, it keeps track of sins and can calculate exactly what the owner’s soul will be reborn as, and when the iPhone is shaken, it makes a noise like a bell.
“There are three different bell sounds,” said Buck. “I like Mountainous Gong.”
Wiccans and Druids are kept in touch with where the various stars are, and even Jedi is catered for with a ‘Thought for the day from Yoda’. Resurrected Hellenestists, who have a god for every situation, are told exactly which one they should sacrifice too in any given situation, and exactly what should be sacrificed.
Even Born Again Christians have an area within the app.
“Using voice recognition,” said Buck, “It can be asked any question at all. I think it does need a bit of work though, as the answer it always gives is ‘Because God willed it’.”
Buck does believe that one major religious group has been omitted from the pantheon of beliefs.
“There’s no atheists option,” he said. “I called R-App-Ture and pointed this out, and they said that in their market research, the atheists didn’t even go in the religious section of the iStore. More their loss, in my opinion.”
He didn't download iBelieve. For God's sake don't make the same mistake!